Begin typing to see the results
Time to read:
7Do you have a vagina, or know someone who has one? Maybe you just want to know what vaginas are really about? We all love vaginas but there are also so many misconceptions, myths & mysteries about them, and as someone who has one and loves it very much, I thought I'd share some of the things I've learned!
First, let's have a mini-anatomy lesson!
First off, what most people are referring to when they say 'vagina' is not actually the vagina, it's the vulva. The external female organ as a whole is called a vulva, but since the vaginal canal is where most of the penetration happens, I guess it’s the term that has become popularised. But that’s a very common mistake that even a lot of vulva owners make! I still refer to my vulva as a vagina when I talk about it in colloquial terms.
Within the vulva, there are many magical parts. There’s the labia, minora and majora, or for ease of use the inner and outer labia. The soft meaty bits that hold it all together are the outer labia, and the ones adorning the vaginal opening are the inner labia. Both labia vary in size, depending on the person, but all are wonderful.
Then you have the mysterious vaginal opening, the actual vagina! This is the part of the vulva that you’re probably most familiar with. It’s the part that is capable of providing a lot of pleasure to the owner of the vulva if stimulated correctly. More so than that, it’s also where a lot of bodily fluids come out, like a period for example. The vagina is also what makes the vulva a self-cleaning organ, where it regularly allows your body to flush out the bad stuff and make sure everything stays fresh and clean down there. That doesn’t exclude vaginas from needing regular care and sexual health testing though, of course!
Right above the vagina is another small opening which is the urethra. Funny enough, a lot of people think vulva owners pee through their vagina too, but it’s of course not true. They are two very separate holes. Hence why we can use a tampon andddd pee at the same time.
And finally, crowned at the top of everything else is the magical clitoris. This is the part of the vulva lots of people are familiar with but don’t know a lot about. When you look at a picture of a clit, it’s essentially the same structure as a penis, but in a much, much more compact way. This means that like a penis, it’s also sensitive and induces pleasure when stimulated, but in an extremely intense way. All the nerves located in the clitoris allow for the creation of a lot of pleasurable feelings. However, the clitoris doesn’t just exist on the outside of the vulva, it also expands inside. It’s what people usually mean when they refer to the “g-spot”. Simultaneous external and internal stimulation of the clitoris is a sure fire way to orgasm. Possibly even squirting!
Now that you know about all the bits and bobs of your genitals, it’s time to get intimate with them.
Before I knew anything about sex, I would often look at my vulva in the mirror and examine all the parts. It was a unique experience as I had never seen anyone else’s vulva, so I thought my vulva was what everyone's vulva looked like. There were no insecurities surrounding it, as it was just a part of me and it looked just how it looked.
I’ve tried to carry that feeling with me as I've grown older, and I enjoy sitting down sometimes with a small hand mirror and looking at myself. It’s a very intimate feeling to see parts of yourself that you don’t usually pay much attention to. By doing that, I’ve discovered that I have a mole on my outer labia that is quite cute! Also, it makes me feel more one with my body as I am making an effort to get to know it more intimately. So I recommend you try that out, sit down and give yourself a good look!
Getting to know your vulva and what comes out of it is an important part of making sure it stays healthy.
The super cool thing is that there are different kinds of discharge expelled from the vagina that can help indicate your vaginal health. It's like a letter sent from your body to keep you updated on how your health is!
There are also different smells attached to the discharges and usually, if it smells very extreme, or more unusual than other times, it's telling you that you might have a problem or something's changed in your health.
My personal routine for making sure my vulva is healthy is taking probiotic tablets daily. I also like to use lactic acid suppositories if I’ve been having penetrative sex. I like to monitor the PH of my vulva using PH testing strips, it helps to know when there’s something wrong. I also like to wash internally with water, using a vaginal douche.
These small habits help me make sure my vulva is happy and healthy!
Finally, let's talk about pleasure.
I feel like vaginal pleasure is talked about a lot, as it’s what’s portrayed the most in porn, with regards to penetration whether it’s fingering or toys or an actual penis. And yes, penetration is a way for a lot of people to feel pleasure and even orgasm, but it’s not for everyone. This is why I wanted to talk a little bit more about clitoral pleasure, and combining it with vaginal stimulation.
There are so many things you can do with a clitoris. You can tease it, you can touch it, you can lick it, and maybe (with consent!!) lightly bite it even. There are a lot of fun & unique toys designed for internal clit stimulation too, my favourite one being Njoy’s “Pure Wand”.
The curved shape fits perfectly inside the contours of the body and creates very enjoyable pressure. Add that together with some fingering of the clit on the outside, and it can get quite explosive. I’ve had a few (happy) crying orgasms myself from this toy.
Another way to incorporate clit stimulation during vaginal sex is having yourself or your partner stimulate your clit from the outside while they’re inside you, whether it’s their penis or their fingers or their tongue. They could use their fingers, but they could also spice it up with a vibrator.
Speaking of vibrators, those are great to build up tension on your clit externally, and also to build up to an amazing orgasm!
If you want to try out a different way to masturbate with your clit, try masturbating on your stomach and grinding against a pillow or a toy. It feels a bit strange if you’ve never done that but it’s a good feeling!
Now that I’ve addressed clitoral pleasure, I think it makes sense to address the vagina too.
Whether you use fingers, dildos, or a tongue to penetrate the vagina, the feeling of fullness can be very enjoyable for some, especially if you use something long enough like the wand I mentioned to stimulate the inside of your clit too! However penetration is not the only thing you can do.
Getting eaten out is super enjoyable too. There are lots of ways to do it. Slowly and sensually can be very fun, with lots of teasing licks. You could also eat someone out extremely passionately, with fast movements and putting your face in there. It’s really about what the person likes, listening to what they say and watching for the cues of what their body responds to.
I hope you learned something new about your body or your partner’s body, and maybe picked up some tips for pleasing the vulva too ;)
